You’re in recovery. Congratulations. That’s amazing. You’re on your way.

Where? Back from despair, desperation, maybe even the brink of death or losing it all. Back to life. You are working on becoming a whole person again.

How? Through caring and accountability. Through intentional steps toward self-awareness and selflessness. And by allowing a lot more humanity bloom in yourself and in your life.

That humanity is actually a relationship skill: Empathy. It’s been buried for too long. And your willingness to recover empathy or even build it from scratch? That’s a huge step.

Why? Because to put yourself in the shoes of others signals a monumental shift. One that isn’t easy. And one that didn’t come naturally to the self-indulgent addict you were.

So you’re doing big things here.

That’s why you need, and deserve, all the tools you can get to keep empathy growing inside you. The following activities are meant to continue supporting and promoting that end.

Don’t wait. Here’s how:

5 More Activities to Help You Develop Empathy

1. Role Play or Role Reversal.

In this exercise, you may be surprised how quickly actually putting yourself “in the shoes” of someone else gets real. Basically, you are to play the role of a person in your life affected by your addiction. Try to behave and sound like them. Ask the hard questions, they would ask. Act out their pain, anger, and worry as you have seen them act it out.

Allowing their suffering to resonate, despite the discomfort, personalizes and humanizes your perception. Additionally, your willingness to reverse roles is a cathartic and trust-building process for your relationship partners.

2. Emotional Intelligence Charts and Cards.

When you were gripped by addiction, the last thing you wanted to be was self-aware. You wanted distance from scary, painful, insecure feelings. To be numb. But, that’s not what you do anymore. Work with an emotions chart or a set of ‘feelings flashcards’ helps promote the clarity you now know is better for you.

Make a habit of identifying and matching what you feel to the emotions listed on the chart or cards. As time goes on, you’ll become more adept at distinguishing your own feelings. This helps you recognize them in others and respond appropriately. Lack of personal insight eventually gives way to a visual, concrete system for a deeper understanding of yourself. Loved ones will begin to relax and trust that your old self-centered reactions will no longer alienate them and isolate you as your empathy returns.

3. Mirroring

Did you know that we are hardwired for empathy via many networks of  mirror neurons in our brains? Recent research indicates that these mirror neurons reflect the actions that we see in other people, causing us to mentally imitate them. Scientists believe these neurons are the initial building block of empathy. Unless addiction gets in the way.

To repair broken empathetic connections, try observational activities. This helps encourage nonverbal recognition and improves your cognitive ability to tune in and listen. Therapy work with a partner teaches you to mirror another person’s actions or expressions. You can even practice “reading” the characters on TV when you’re alone to stimulate your empathetic neural network.

4. Communication skills training

You need people when you’re a recovering addict and you need to be able to talk to them sensitively. It may be that you do feel others’ emotions but don’t know how or when to communicate empathetically.

Fortunately, you can improve communication by noticing your own non-verbal eye movements and focus or facial movements. What do you do nonverbally when you are interacting with people? Ask trusted people or your therapist to tell you what they notice about your nonverbals and voice tone during emotional situations.

Also, pay attention to the times and people with whom you have the hardest time being empathetic. Examine why with your counselor.

Finally, try modeling people who are known to be empathetic. Break down how their behavior expresses empathy and compassion and then imitate those qualities.

5.  Emotional Self-regulation through Mindfulness.

On the whole, mindfulness is about paying attention and asking the very questions that drove you to numb out: What’s the point of my life? Do I matter? Who am I anyway?

The inability to regulate the thoughts and emotions that accompany these questions make it difficult to deal with ourselves, let alone the needs of others. The self-absorbed process of pleasure-oriented distraction and addiction gets in the way.

Emotional regulation through mindfulness training gives you the means to become aware of your breath, thoughts, reactions, and impact on others without judgment. From there, you can obtain the clarity, self-compassion, and perspective that grows more empathy in your relationships.

So now you see that empathy is a basic human skill. And now you know that addiction can steal even what is fundamental and make it foreign.

You deserve better.

Welcome back to life and the people that care about you.

Welcome back to being able to care about them too.