Sex addiction can feel like an impossible problem to deal with. For addicts, sex becomes a way of managing overwhelming emotion or stress. When the addiction threatens relationships, work, self-respect, and reputation, the addict will try to stop. But, the emotions and stresses remain and the compulsion to return to addictive behavior overcomes his or her resolve.

Identifying the roots of the addiction is a big step toward finding a solution to permanently stop the addictive behavior. The 6 Typology Model of Sex Addiction developed by psychologist and author Douglas Weiss offers therapists a framework for treatment.

  1. Biological sex addict: This type of sex addict is literally wired for their addiction. Frequent and consistent masturbation focusing on a particular fantasy scenario, pornography or a fetish carves neuro-pathways in brain associated with pleasure. This is especially so if those behaviors occur during one’s formative years. Those neuro-pathways eventually produce a rush of pleasure on par with the addictive qualities of morphine or heroine and the addictive cycle begins.
  2. Psychological sex addict: The psychological addict uses sex to meet core inner needs, which when left unfulfilled, result in psychological pain. For example, a person who is abused or neglected naturally seeks escape from the pain of that mistreatment. Some turn to fantasy, creating a comfortable world of unconditional love. That fantasy eases anxiety and replaces the pain of abuse with the pleasure of being fully accepted and wanted. The fantasy becomes so intense, there is an actual chemical component to the relief, an internal “drug” to dull pain.
  3. Spiritual sex addict: The person who is raised with no experience of spirituality longs deeply for a connection to a higher power. When sex is used to fill the void it can become an object of worship. If the individual is introduced to a true spiritual connection, the sexual addiction is no longer needed and fades away.
  4. Trauma sex addict: The trauma of sexual abuse creates a frantic need to emotionally manage the experience. One coping method is to replay the event compulsively, trying to gain control over what happened. By reversing the roles, taking the position of master, the addict tries literally to reverse the experience. In this case, trauma work is essential for the addict to heal.
  5. Intimacy Anorexia sex addict: The Intimacy Anorexia sex addict’s addiction is defined by his “Acting in” behaviors, actively withholding intimacy from one’s spouse/partner. By refusing emotional, sexual and even spiritual intimacy, the addicts feel in control of the situation and of themselves. Their biggest fear is suffering pain, a universal risk in intimacy, so all contact is without attachment or a relationship forming. This addict may make excuses for avoiding intimacy, blame his or her partner for the distance between them, refuse sex or praise or love and substitute anger and silence for real sharing of feelings. The Intimacy Anorexia addict will usually have “Acting out” behaviors as well, but the main addiction is the anorexia. If that is not addressed, the acting out aspect of the addiction will not be able to stop for any length of time.
  6. Mood disorder sex addict: Sex in this case is employed to stabilize or regulate a mood disorder like anxiety, bipolar disease, or chronic depression. The mood disorder sex addict uses sexual release as a medication to treat the emotional pain.

A therapist begins treatment by assessing which type or types of sex addiction the client is struggling with. Questions will address family relationships, spirituality, history of sexual abuse, and use of pornography with masturbation.

When the specific type of sex addiction is clarified, the therapist can help the sex addict recognize and respond in a healthy way to the root causes of the addiction.

If the addict is in a committed relationship, his or her partner can be a powerful addition to the therapy, helping to identify the damage done by the addiction and working with the addict to escape from the addiction. Working together as a couple also pushes the addict to give up on lying about his or her behavior, take responsibility, and acknowledge the real cost of refusing to change.